Currently Best of By Chordettes Lollipop see related

latest update!

Currently Breakthrough By Colbie Caillat I Never Told You see related

Sometimes I miss who I used to be;

A girl who was a bubbly, happy mess.

I was able to look at life and smile and see the silver lining in the storm clouds.

My idea of being 'risky' with words around my parents, was saying "poop stain" or "crap".

Now it's "sh**".

The girl I used to be could have swore magic did, in fact, exist. Somewhere, somehow, every wish you wished would somehow come true.

Meet me now.

Hi, I'm a stubborn, reclusive girl with a morbid sense of humor and scars (physical and emotional). I have confidence that I swear just showed up one day that was not there before. I'm starting to realize that it's not really confidence though; it's a covered up form of defense. I'm more closed off to the world than I ever was before.

I don't mind being alone so much now. Before, I used to freak at the thought of being home alone all day. But now, the solitude has kind of grown on me. I've taught myself to except and become friends with the thick silence that engulfs me most of the day.

I used to look out to the world through a tiny window and just see grass, trees, rocks, etc. Now I find myself being more sensitive to what's around me. I feel like the earth almost has a sort of beating heart inside it. If I were to lay on the ground, I feel like I would feel and hear a steady beating. Streams were just streams and rivers before. But now, they seem to me like roaring animals, or steady, calm sources of energy.

I guess the new me just has different and more deep views on life that the old me.